


fourteen nights to win a wraith's heart

by Hibari_chan



Series: About Wraith honor and other stories [3]
Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Developing Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, Fluff, M/M, Underage Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-01
Updated: 2015-11-04
Packaged: 2018-03-04 20:14:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3087614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hibari_chan/pseuds/Hibari_chan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The lovestory of Sin the Keeper Commander and his lover, Stardust, from the start, to the very end. Fourteen nights which formed Sin's life, his heart and his destiny.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. night one

**Author's Note:**

> My beloved, amazing beta Blue_Night (oh, thank you so much for your quick beta-read!) loves Sin in her own presentation and I love Sin like this. Well I highly enjoy his cocky, lazy personality with a vocabulary of street paver too, but there is a beauty in him, hidden somewhere and I would love to show you this inside his wounded heart.
> 
> If you read my story To Be Good And Honorable, you may remember Stardust. I mentioned him in some chapter with Sin in one short sentence and I am afraid it does not honor him well. He was Sin's life, his moon and stars, his lover, his teacher, his everything. He was also very important for Todd (and you can enjoy baby Todd in this chapter! althrough he will have more space in other chapters... so do not worry, I promise it will be fun)
> 
> By The Way... the idea of cleaning Dart Bay I stole from my beta's stories! (be sure you read it too!) But the idea of cleaning it with tooth brush is entirely mine (I hope so...) :-D
> 
> Tell me which Sin you prefer!  
> And enjoy my story!
> 
> (If Sin's and Todd's father does not set his lab on fire till the end if this month, you will have another chapter soon.)

Sin sat on the stairs under the Queen's throne. There was a one year old Wraith baby in his arms, tucked into his embrace, sucking at his thumb as the unknown Wraith approached closer to them. Shiriahnor Shiri as his older brother called him oftentimes, was afraid of unknown Wraith and even his beloved brother's arms around him did not feel safe enough. His mother, the Queen, knew about her son's weakness, and in truth, it was the reason why she had decided to present her youngest to the new part of the crew.  
  
"Sin," she addressed her oldest son haughtily. "This is Stardust. He will be the Second in Command just after your father. I hope you will get along well and you will show him how this Hive works so he will have no problems with integrating into the local system command. I also hope that you will not dishonor my Hive as it is your habit to do so."  
  
"Of course, my Queen," Sin said with his silent, emotionless voice. He just tenderly hugged his brother again and let him tangle his small fingers into his own quite short hair. "I will do my best to behave."  
  
"Very well, you can leave. And Sin, give Shiriahn to me, before you'll leave. I am sure he will not enjoy a simple walk through the Hive."  
  
She did that to hurt Sin, he knew it well. The relationship between two brothers was a strong one. They depended on each other, even if there were sixteen years between them, and it was not unusual for them to sleep in one bed. She despised their relationship, she wanted her sons to be strong and from her point of view, it was weakness to love each other so much.  
  
So she tried to keep them separated as much as it was possible.  
  
"Of course, my Queen," he said and handed his brother to his mothers arms. She gently touched Shiri's cheek but her eyes were cold and hard when she smiled at him. She waved her hand to dismiss them and all of them bowed to her. She was not a cruel Queen, but she surely knew how to show her displeasure.  
  
"Follow me," The seventeen years old Wraith said to the new Second in Command and he left the room with the unknown Wraith behind his back. He felt his look, burning into his back as he walked away from Throne room. "I would present you to the Commander, but he is occupied elsewhere," he started as they waked through the corridors. "You can usually find him in his private lab, nearby the Hive's labs. He uses his lab as his study, so feel free to enter whenever you need to discuss an urgent matter with him. Your room will be near this place so be sure to have a lot of plants in your room to clean the air. My father.. The Commander likes to work with many substances and, usually, it smells terribly."  
  
Stardust actually chuckled. "You are not happy to have me here, are you?"  
  
Sin stopped after the surprising change of topic and took a breath before he answered. "I.. do not like Wraith I cannot trust even a little. Also I do not like untrustworthy Wraith near my family."  
  
"I see. You do not need to fear me. I will stay there only for a small time, then I will return to my Hive."  
  
The young Wraith turned to face Stardust with shocked expression on his face. "W-what?"  
  
Stardust laughed. "You are cute when you are babbling like this. I am one of the Keepers. My Queen has a deal with yours. I am here to observe and learn."  
  
"What kind of deal?"  
  
"You do not need to fear. It is nothing too serious. You and your family will not be harmed."  
  
Sin did not trust him - it was clear from the look he gave to the older Wraith. He pressed his lips to a thin line and continued with the tour. It was meaningless to try to get some intel from other Wraith - the deal was between two powerful Queens and he was just a youngling.  
  
"You will find that our Hive is not different from others. We have a 4 hours long shift, turning in the eight-hour intervals. Four hours of working, four hours of rest or anything else you want to do. You will get the schedule of work at the beginning of each week so do not worry. You have to write your code number down only for the lab or the training grounds so the schedule can be made specifically for you..."  
  
Stardust watched the youngling with obvious lust in his eyes. He had many qualities which attracted his lovers but his look was simply not one of them - he was not handsome in most standards with a big scar on his face and burn on the left side of his head where hair refused to grow any longer so he shaved the left half and only the right side of his skull was covered with long, silvery hair. But he was strong and intimidating and he held power. His body was the body of as strong, devoted warrior and he was as intelligent as most of the scientists.   
  
He could not complain about a lack of sex, but the young Wraith before him was really attractive with his young skin, the long hair and strong body which started to form to a body of warrior. His face was handsome with chiseled features Stardust found very lustful so it was no surprise he wanted this one in his bed.  
  
Also, he noticed the lack of awareness on Sin's side of his obvious beauty. He had to be ignorant, or virgin and Stardust found the second option very amusing. He would love to deflower this one.  
  
"... and I would recommend to you to never piss off my father without a very good reason you are able to uphold. He has a very big bad habit to make you clean the dart bay only with a teeth brush. So, here we are. Your rooms. If you have any more questions feel free to ask. Otherwise I will go to find my father to make an acquaintance with you."  
  
"No, thank you," answered the older Wraith with a subtle smiled. "But," he said, after he touched Sin's hand and held it for a two or three seconds. "Are you free. Tonight? I would like to make an acquaintance with you too."  
  
Sin felt a shiver around his spine from the gentle, but seductive touch on his feeding hand. He still did not need to feed on humans to survive, but he knew the urge would come eventually and certainly sooner than later. "I-..."  
  
Stardust's fingers moved from his palm to his face. He could feel the touches on his cheeks and chin and even his lips as the older Wraith pulled him closer for simple, chaste kiss. Their lips brushed and Sin felt the unknown tongue to touch his upper lip during the kiss. It was both arousing and scary. His first kiss...  
  
"So young, so innocent. It is miracle that you are still so pure," Stardust purred happily after he had ended the kiss. "Will you come to my rooms?"  
  
Sin was hardly able to found his breath. He felt an uncomfortable tension in his pants. It almost hurt too much to ignore it. "I.. I have to take care of my little brother..." he said after a while of silence. The older Wraith grinned as he grasped Sin's chin and made him to look into his golden eyes. "I..."  
  
"We will see each other then."  


* * *

  
  
When Stardust heard the knocking on his door and felt the gentle touch on his mind, he was preparing for a shower. He was very glad to find his own private shower in his rooms, because it was not unusual for a Hive to have only public showers in the center of a Hive or near the training ground. With only a towel around his hips he went to open the door only to find one young blushing virgin in the corridor, waiting for him to invite inside.  
  
He really hadn't expect to find the young Wraith there, because of the hour, but he was delighted, nonetheless. "Come inside," he told the young one and let Sin came into his private rooms. "I am going to shower. Join me," he said in amused voice. "We will save water."  
  
Sin bit his lower lip nervously. He avoided the public showers as much as he could and his father was so kind to let him use his private one. "I never took shower with others."  
  
"I realized," chuckled Stardust in mocking voice. "You are overdressed." With that he came closer to Sin and started to undress him. The youngling wore only leather pants and a black shirt to cover himself. Sin battled a little with him but he resigned eventually. "C'mon, do not be shy. You are really handsome, there is nothing you need to be ashamed of," he whispered to him as he dropped his shirt on the ground.  
  
Sin was built beautifully, with hard but still small muscles and solid body. Stardust touched his skin very tenderly, because it was obvious that Sin was uncertain about the whole thing right now and he did not want to scare him even further. "Do not be afraid of me, Sin," he said. "I will not force myself upon you. If we will couple tonight, or any other day, it will depend only on your decision to do so."  
  
After his kind voice, Sin relaxed a little bit and started to unbutton his pants. He knew that it was usual practice to share a shower for the sake of saving precious water. The water supplies were not endless and it took a very long time for a Hive to restore... but on the other hand, it was also a common practice share not only a water, but also a body. It was the main reason why he preferred his father's private shower. He hated to had his body exposed to others. He felt vulnerable.  
  
"And what if I will decide that we will never... couple?" Sin asked with a voice full of shame. The talking about an sexual matter was not really easy for him.  
  
Stardust laughed. "Then I will enjoy your friendship. I do not enjoy unwilling partners in my bed, youngling."  
  
The older Wraith continued with undressing the young one with his skillful, nimble fingers. He took a great deal in doing it as gently as he could to don't frighten Sin more. "Let me," he said as he pushed his hands away from his pants and stripped him. "You can stop shaking, Sin. I do not intend to hurt you."  
  
With that, he put away the towel, covering his lap, so the youngling would not feel ashamed of himself (and he knew he could be if he would be the only one naked) so his powerful body of an experienced warrior was fully exposed to Sin's eyes.    
  
"Come to the shower," he whispered to Sin's ear and took his hand to lead him to the bathroom. It was a standard private bathroom with a practical shower and a bathtub for relaxing the muscles after a mission or hard training. There was also a mirror and a washbasin and a towel holder with three towels. It was a nice, warm room and it smelled nicely. It calmed Sin's nerves a little.   
  
He felt uneasy around this Wraith, but at the same time, it was exciting and arousing, as well. He had never had the opportunity to touch another male Wraith in his short lifetime, as his father and brother kept him busy without time for further experiences. There was also his problem with trust which overload him every time he wanted to go to the common showers to enjoy some kissing and touching.  
  
The older Wraith prepared the shower quickly and Sin was pleased with the water temperature. For a Wraith, the right temperature was important as their body could relax only in colder water than their body temperature. They were very sensitive to overheating.  
  
Sin stepped into the shower. The cold water ran through his hair and gently touched his shoulders like lover's fingertips. He sensed another being just behind him, his heat, his presence, but now it did not worried him. He welcomed it and Sin smiled.  
  
But still, he was unsure - about his body or about his short hair, because most Wraith preferred their lovers with longer hair than he usually had. He cut it every three month, just above his shoulders and it was almost two and half months since the last cut. He was irritated with its length and eager to cut it already.  
  
Sin moaned when the water soothed his body, tired from the hard, long day, taking away the sweat and grime. "Thank you," he said sincerely and he smiled. The older Wraith chuckled in amusement and he pressed his body against Sin's back. Sin found himself seeking comfort in the embrace from all his worries and it surprised and pleased him at the same time. The arms around his waist touched him with concern and he felt safe and cared for. Those feelings were unknown to the young Wraith, with the war and despotic mother above his head, waiting to strike... and, of course, his younger, vulnerable brother to take care for. Fear was a very familiar feeling for him so it was scary to do not feel afraid at all.   
  
"Relax," the older Wraith told him and then, Sin felt the soft touch of Stardust's lips on his shoulder. The kisses went up to his hairline and a sensitive ear and then down again, to tease his neck and collarbone. He shivered when Stardust touched his spine with a single move, pressing on the sensitive places around the bones. It was arousing as hell and Sin found himself hard with the need to be touched more. "Eager, I see. maybe I should kiss you properly then? I can see that you waiting for it."  
  
Sin turned in his arms to face him. Their bodies brushed against each other and he moaned again, louder. "Please..."  
  
"Do not worry, little one. I will please you," Stardust murmured and he kissed the young Wraith heatedly. He put a hand behind Sin's neck to keep him in place and continued with ravishing the youngling's mouth with his lips and tongue. He pressed against Sin's lips and they opened for him almost immediately. Sin was obviously inexperienced but he learned quickly and answered to his kisses with enthusiasm.   
  
Sin automatically pressed against Stardust's body, seeking release for his hard manhood. It hurt but it was very pleasing and he could not resist his urge to rube his cock rhythmically again his tight. Stardust smiled and grabbed his cock into his palm to help him to get his release.   
  
"Let me help you, Sin."  
  
It took only a few touches for Sin to reach an incredible orgasm. He was young and without previous experiences and his stamina matched this fact. Stardust was not surprised and he enjoyed Sin's satisfied scream, his fingers buried in his shoulders and the expression in Sin's face as he came.   
  
He hugged Sin to support him, otherwise he was sure that the younger Wraith would have fallen on the floor every moment. With passing seconds, he listened to Sins breath, till it had calmed down.  
  
"Tired?" he asked him and Sin nodded. It had been a hard day for him and this had worn him off, completely. Stardust chuckled and took him in his arms. He stopped the water and covered Sin's body in towel, before he took him to his bedroom and laid him down on the mattress. He did not care for the water, soaking his bed as he smiled and pressed soft kiss to Sin's lips. "Rest. I will clean the bathroom and then I will join you. Try to sleep."  
  
Sin murmured something in the respond but Stardust did not understand him, and then he fell asleep.  


* * *

  
  
Sin woke up in the morning. The bed was empty and his clothes were lying folded on the night table with a glass of water and an apple. He gratefully drank the whole glass and bit into the apple. It was sweet and he finished it while he dressed. Stardust was gone - his clothes were not there and the room did not smelled like him, but the bag with his personal things near the door was proof enough that he was still on board. It soothed Sin but also frightened him - he could not imagine to meet him in the corridor or in a working station and pretend that nothing happened.   
  
He sighed. Yesterday night was still a very clear memory for him and on top of it, a very pleasant one.   
  
When he reached his father's and his own common rooms, he felt ashamed of himself. His father sat behind the kitchen table, pretending that he was doing some paper work (although it looked more like he wanted to burn it all and laugh at his Queen's ass for thinking he would do it without protests).  
  
"Good morning, Father," he whispered when he closed the door and sat on the chair beside his father's. There was breakfast prepared for him as always, but he was too nervous to actually eat.  
  
"Good, son. I hope you enjoyed your evening."  
  
Sin blushed and hid his face into his palms.   
  
His father laughed openly and put his hand on his firstborn's shoulder. "Oh, c'mon, Sin. Do not cry like a stupid human girl," he said, still laughing at his son's discomfort. "Come, let set my lab on fire again. I have some explosives you will surely enjoy. And if not, you can always kill yourself with one of them."  
  
"Dad.." sobbed the young Wraith desperately.   
  
"You are unbelievable. Come, before you shame yourself further, or you will start to hate yourself. I cannot say I understand your choice of lover, but I am glad you found one. I was starting to think you cannot even get it up."  
  
"I hate you, dad."  
  
"That is the spirit. There you have some paperwork. If you finish it before lunch, I will not tell your mother."


	2. second night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Without a start, without a devotion, there cannot be an end. Enjoy the second night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All the credit belongs to my wonderfull beta, Blue_Night!  
> Well, really, without her, there would be no chapter today! She is quite inspiring person, ya know? :-)
> 
> All remaining mistakes are all mine.
> 
> Enjoy the chapter!

Sin was really busy in the lab (as he was usually in this daytime), but it did not bother his little, five years old brother, who watched his older sibling with great love and devotion in his eyes. Little Shiri was adorable, sitting on the table, eating some sweets and babbling about his day since he had woken up and he even did not realize that his brother did not pay him the usual attention.   
  
Since their father had killed himself in the explosion caused by one of his experiments, they were almost alone on this ship and Sin had to work hard for both of them. Their mother had found a new lover for herself and she was expecting a new family soon and she did not care about them since then, not like a true mother would have done anyway.  
  
The life on board of his mother's ship was difficult and hard, but he began to get used to the hard, unpleasant work in lab he hated with all his heart. He had to, to take care of his little sibling.  
  
"Sin, do you listen to me? Sin!" Shiri cried out.   
  
"Hm..."  
  
"Sin! It was important! Sin!"  
  
"Mh-mm..."  
  
"Let him work, Shiri," said Stardust, who just had entered the lab and watched the two siblings with amusement on his scarred facial features. He rested against a wall with his arms crossed over his chest. "He doesn't listen to his surroundings, not really. Look at him - the berserk look in his eyes, his nose is shaking, moving up and down, the fingers trying to kill the innocent keyboard. Soon, really, even sooner than you can count, there will be a grey, bad smelling smoke pouring from his ears and then his head will get all red and he will explode like an atomic bomb," Stardust mocked Sin without getting any reaction from the young Wraith scientist.  
  
Shiri blinked, confused. "His head will look like a mushroom?"  
  
Stardust nodded, all serious, but his eyes told a different story as he approached them. It was story of lust and love, one which Sin was totally blind to. Shiri smiled happily as the warrior took him up and let him rest inside his arms. Stardust's hair was immediately full of two curious fists of a five years old Wraith child, playing with them in a not very gentle manner, but Stardust did not mind this. He loved children and he was especially very fond of this one.  
  
It was almost four years since he had come here and his free time was always filled with children’s games he played with this one. Most of the crew was amazed about their new Commander and his gentle behavior towards those two as well as they were quite stunned with his attitude towards them. Stardust might be strict, but, he was fair and he listened and tried to help. It was something they had not known before and he was loved for this.   
   
Which was not a thing you could say about his young, explosive and quite eccentric lover, Sin, who was not the one you wanted to find when you have troubles. Sin was very alike to his father, mostly silent, but when he spoke, he was rude, uncaring of the hurt feelings of others and sometimes even cruel to those around him, the only exception being his little brother.  
  
They might remember Sin’s temperament before the accident with his father had happened, but he had changed completely from the nice, innocent being to a withdrawn being with a minimum of friends.  
      
“I do not think that my brother would look nice with a mushroom in a place of his head..” whispered Shiri with his eyes completely taken with the long, silver hair of the older Wraith, who smiled and kissed the boy on the temple of his head.   
  
“No?” he asked the youngling in the same manner. “I do not think so, as well. Maybe, we should cheer him up, his shift is almost over. What do you think?”  
  
“He will be angry.”  
  
“Mhm, yes, he will be. But it will not stop us, will it? You should go to the kitchen for some good dessert, what do you think?” Stardust smiled at Shiri and put him back on the floor, watching as the young one ran away to the kitchen with obvious joy. “Sin,” he said as he went to the creature behind one of the consoles. Stardust sighed and he went closer so he could put his arms around Sin’s waist from behind and hug him.    
  
“Sin, the work time is over,” he whispered into the other’s ear. “You should eat something and go to sleep.”  
  
The younger body shuddered as it was awakened from its focusing on the work which required so much of its abilities. “I cannot. Have work to do.”  
  
Stardust would have raised his eyebrow, if he actually had possessed one because of this statement. “Sin… You are working on the same sentence since I left the lab. You need to sleep.”   
  
“It is a very complicated matter.”  
  
“I am sure of it, but,” with that, Stardust turned off the working console. “You can continue tomorrow.”  
  
Sin gave his lover a very edgy look as he was torn from his work so unexpectedly, but Stardust only place his hand over Sin’s cheek and narrowed his eyes. “You are so pale, Sin,” he sighed. “You have to rest.”  
  
“Are you saying this to me as my superior or as my friend?” Sin asked bitterly.  
  
“I am saying this to you as your lover and partner… and as your superior too, of course. I cannot afford you to do some damage to the ship in the state you are in.”  
  
“How dare you, I would never damage the ship!”  
  
Stardust did not answer at first, he just pulled Sin closer and kissed him fully on his lips. “I know you would not. Not deliberately. I will take you to my room, okay?”  
  


* * *

  
  
Stardust watched his lover eat the fruit as Sin because of his incomprehensible statement that it hurt to eat, refused to feed from humans. He could not say that he understood his lover and it pained him to see him in this state. Sin could not sleep, could not eat and his mind was, sometimes, out of control. The youngling possessed too much power he couldn't deal with and Stardust feared that this power could crush him someday.   
  
He had watched strong Queens trembled because of their power and still, their power was not really comparable to Sin’s abilities. He worried for him, even more as the youngling was so uncaring for his own healthiness since his father’s death.  
  
They never talked about it, but Stardust suspected some trauma – well, he would be traumatized, if his father would have died right before him, torn into pieces.  
  
It was almost a year now since that dreadful night, but Sin still lived in his past in some way, unable to put it behind him and carry only the best memories with him, not the bad ones.   
  
“Sin, we need to talk,” he said when he sat on the bed close to his lover.   
  
Sin was silent, licking his fingers and cleaning them from the fruit juice.  
   
“You want to talk about the past. I do not wish to,” he said in the end with a stone face.  
  
“Not only about the past, but yes, I want to talk about it too,” Stardust murmured. He took Sin’s hand and kissed it with visible devotion. “You are my lover, Sin, and you mean the world to me. It hurts me to see you suffer like this. I wished I could help you, I wished I could share your burden and make you smile again as you used to and I would do anything to make it happen.”  
  
Sin actually smiled a little at his lover. “I know you would like to, Stardust, I just,” he sighed and the smile was gone. “I just cannot trust you. Agh… I DO trust you in some way, I just… I am afraid to share myself with you. I cannot force myself to trust you completely.”  
  
Stardust watched him with a sad expression. “I would like to prove myself to you…”  
  
“You do not need to. There is no way how you could prove this to me. It is inside me. I cannot trust anybody whom I did not know his or her whole life. I feel like I cannot be sure of anything and anybody.”  
  
Stardust took Sin’s chin between his fingers and kissed him. It was a sweet kiss, full of promises of a better future. “But surely you can tell me what is wrong with you, Sin,” he whispered after the kiss. “I want to take care of you. Tell me, what happened, with your father, Sin, please. I want to take that burden from you.”  
  
“It was just an ordinary day. We were in the lab, and my father was pestering me about my lack of… I am not sure what it was, he was worried about something and he was unbearable. He just… did not take care and took the wrong ingredient from the table and… it exploded… it… it…”  
  
“Sin…” Stardust hugged the trembling body almost immediately after the tears started to appear in the young Wraith eyes. “Sin, it is alright. You can cry…”  
  
Sin sobbed a little. “It destroyed half of the lab and dad… it exploded and… he was… there were pieces of… of flesh and blood everywhere… It took so long for the alarm to ring, but there was nothing that could... that could save h-him. His head was… there was no head, Stardust… there was no head…”  
  
Stardust had seen the body when they finally had found all the pieces, and it had not been a pleasant experience. The raw flesh was visible, the skin burned and the bones shattered into small pieces. No Gift of life could heal this kind of damage.  
  
“He did not feel any pain, they said. That he was dead quickly. That... he did not even knew it. Is it true?”  
  
“He did not suffer,” agreed Stardust and wrapped Sin into the blankets. He let him cry for some time, holding him and shielding him from the big bad world he had to live in. “He loved you, Sin. He loved you so much, you know? After our first night he came to me and told me that if I would ever hurt you, he would find everyone I love and kill them all just to make me pay for your pain. He might have not shown it, but he cared for you a great deal. You and Shiri were his reasons to live, I believe so. You... you are so much alike him. You always seem so uncaring but, deep inside you scream with raw feelings. He is proud of you, he always was.”  
  
“Did I’ve ever hurt you?”  
  
“A few times, yes,” Stardust nodded. “But I know you did not mean it and I am a very forgiving person, Sin. I cannot hold grudge against you, I love you.”  
  
“I know, you told me before. Are you angry with me that I do not feel the same?”  
  
Stardust took his time to consider his answer, before he spoke again. “No. I am not angry. I am disappointed, maybe, but I still believe you will love me one day.”  
  
Sin smiled as his head rested on Stardust’s chest. “I believe so, as well. I will tell you, okay?”  
  
The older Wraith nodded and kissed the younger one tenderly. “It was not all I wanted to talk about with you tonight,” he admitted after a few minutes of kissing and cuddling. “I noticed that you use to leave our bed in the middle of night and your… eating cousin… it is not healthy, Sin. You are torturing your body and I need you healthy,” he said as he wiped away tears from Sin’s cheeks.    
  
Sin closed his eyes and sighed. “I cannot sleep,” he admitted. “Even since before my father’s accident, I have had trouble with sleeping. It seems like there is so much in my mind that I cannot relax and rest properly. It is like there is some strong power somewhere which always pulls on the strings in my mind every time I start to fall asleep to keep me awake. My head is still filled with voices, it is such a mess, that I cannot focus on my work or anything else. It… it prevents me from feeding… it always start to hurt… my mind start to hurt, it is like it becomes preoccupied in the moment I start to feed… it is worse than torture. I feel so helpless…”  
  
Stardust touched Sin’s head and brushed his fingers through his short, silver hair. “Have I ever told you about my sister?”  
  
Sin shook his head, enjoying the smell of Stardust’s skin that penetrated his sensitive nostrils. Stardust’s scent was very specific, but for Sin it was the best one in the world. It soothed him every time Stardust was close to him and it made him feel safe and protected. “No, not yet.”  
  
“Well, she is a truly remarkable Queen. She is the Keepers Queen, her hair has the color of ripe raspberries, her skin is very pale and she always wears white, simple dresses. She is a real beauty, you know, but it is not the reason why I am telling you about her, even if I probably should admit that I was describing her to you just to give myself an opportunity to remember her,” Stardust chuckled. “She is also a very powerful Queen. I am not talking about the number of ships under her alliance, but mostly about her mental skills. When she was as young as you are now, her abilities started to show up. She was… terrified at first, to be honest, but, as time went by, she started to control them and it transformed from being her enemy into her most useful tool. Your mental powers are high as well, the voices, the strings you feel, it is the manifestation of those powers…”  
  
“So, you believe that I have some… Queen powers?”  
  
“No,” Stardust said. “I believe that your powers have the same nature as every Queen's ones. In time, you will be able to read minds no matter how guarded, you will recognize the truth from the lie only with the smells of them, you will be more than capable to control masses and Hives. You will be capable of torturing your enemy with only a wish and change one life into a living hell with a smile on your beautiful face. I also believe that your powers are stronger than the powers of any Queen I’ve ever met. I cannot explain it just now. There is the high possibility, that you were meant to be born as a Queen, but in the last minute, the nature changed your course and you were born as a mere male.”  
  
“As… when I will control those powers, I will be capable to sleep again?”  
  
“I do not know. She never had problems with sleeping. It is a new phenomenon to me, but I will do anything to help you.”  
  
“I will have to think about it,” murmured Sin. With his fingers he studied the structure of his lover’s long hair. He still kept his own quite short, the longest strands reached his shoulders, but it was mostly shorter. “I like your hair. I don’t have the nerve to let it grow this long.”  
  
“Then keep it short. The haircut is not the reason I love you.”  
  
Sin nodded. “Will you make love to me tonight?”  
  
“Is that wise, with the level of your sleep deprivation?” Stardust asked in a concerned voice.   
  
The younger Wraith chuckled. “Is it ever?”  
  
“With you? No, I do not think so, Sin,” Stardust answered with a broad smile and he kissed the youngling one more time. “Sleep, Sin. Try to, at least. For me.”  
  


* * *

  
  
Sin stood on the small bridge near the dart bay and he watched the window, the stars that passed by with every second. The Universe. This beautiful, dangerous universe he was born to live in. He was tough. He was strong. He would survive.  
  
He felt it in his bones. The hard life he would live, all aspect of living in his future. Laughing and crying with the ones he would care for. That was the future he wished for, full of unrepeatable moments you would never forget and which would warm you in the time of need.  
  
That was the future he would make for the ones he loved. He had to. He was strong. The power was there, waiting to be taken, wanting to be used as he wished. It was the reason it existed, was it? To be used for the purposes which would serve him best. Small needles pierced painfully his mind when he touched those castles in the air he sensed inside his mind. He petted them gently, tasted them, licked them.   
  
It was almost unbearable, the nausea tried to take him far away to the land of oblivion. He could struggle, he struggled. He was stronger than to surrender.   
  
He would never surrender. No matter what pain he had to endure. He would live for the moments of undying happiness, waiting for them, patiently.   
  
No matter how many would die, no matter how many would never be born because of his choices. He would be the survivor. He decided in the moment he watched the stars shining through millennia of time.   
  
It was his ultimate decision.  
  
“Why are you crying, brother?” asked him Shiri, when he touched his hand. His small being was all comfort Sin needed. The picture of a bright, shining future, with his beloved brother by his side, flashing through his mind. He smiled gently and took his brothers palm into his own.  
  
He would always protect this one. He was the legacy of them both. If Sin was destined to see the world only in his darkness, his brother would be the shining star he saw from the window.   
  
One day, they would change it. They would change it all.  
  
 “Pain and happiness, Shiriahn. To taste all flavors of life, you need them both.”  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well.. I told ya, I LOVEEE kudos and comments before, did I?  
> BTW, I am sure Sin loves them too.... :-P


	3. night three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> night three... Stardust's sister 
> 
> enjoy :-)
> 
> and thanks comes to my beta for her amazing job - thank you!

Sin was lying in Stardust’s bed, tired and with a headache so strong he thought he would die from it. It was so uncomfortable and painful he screamed more than tenth times and cried even more. But now he was just so exhausted he didn’t want to move at all. Like from a great distance he heard Stardust’s movements as the older Wraith sat down next to him and patted his sweat-matted hair. Most of the time he loved Stardust’s care for him, but right now, he was so much in pain it was almost unbearable.

“Sin, love…” the Commander whispered to him lovingly. “Please, you need to eat and rest. Please…” he said but Sin didn’t understand his words. He felt his lover’s presence but other than that he was unable to even register. His senses, usually sharp and strong, were subdued. “Love, please. Look at me?”

Sin knew that Stardust was scared as hell for him. He knew… somewhere inside him, that he should have to comfort him and tell him that everything was gonna be fine, but he could not. He could not form the words. He could not even move. All of his existence was cut off and only the pain lasted. He felt so sick.

The older Wraith just bent and he kissed Sin’s forehead. It was hot ‘cause of the fever which burned through Sin’s body. Little Shiri was not allowed to see his brother and it was truly hard for the little one who was used to his brother’s everyday constant presence. But Stardust just could not risk him getting sick as well. 

Wraiths were usually very healthy, but Sin’s condition was very special, because of its origin. His male body still struggled with his Queens powers, making Sin suffer in the process. There was no way Stardust could help him. He could only spend him company and watch as Sin’s own body slowly destroyed him, piece by piece. The inability to help, the feelings of despair, were too much for him to bear right now. 

“Sin, please…” he said after a while and then he lowered his body and laid down behind the youngling so he could put his arms around him and pull him close into his embrace. “Fight with it, please. Do not give up. Please… I love you, remember? Fight for me. I cannot live in this world without you. You have to fight it. Sin, please…”

He suspected his words could not reach the young Wraith, but he had to try. He could not give up the hope that Sin would hear him… that he would fight for him and for them. For the feelings between them, which were growing stronger every single day.

“Please fight. You’re good - you’re honorable. You cannot die on me. Not now.”

+++

When Sin finally started to react to his surroundings, he realized that he was not in his rooms. That he was not even in Stardust rooms. The air was filled with a scent of flowers and it was a rich scent, sweet one, which caressed his own senses and brought peace. It was just a nice fragrance he had never smelled before that he felt immediately in love with it. 

The bed he lay in was soft and warm unlike those on his mother’s ship. It was very comfortable and smelled wonderfully, just like the air.

“I see you are finally awake. My brother will be pleased,” said a strong, but tender voice of a Queen and when Sin opened his eyes he could see her silhouette sitting on a velvet armchair. She wore a simple white dress and her long thick hair was made of pure rubies mixed with a basket of ripe raspberries. She was very, very beautiful and in her eyes was a wisdom and hidden strength. 

She touched Sin’s forehead and she smiled. “Your fever is broken. You should be fine soon. How do you feel?”

Sin swallowed nervously. He still felt sick but his head troubled him no more. He was still very tired but he was positive to be fine in no time. “I feel… good my Queen,” he whispered. His neck was sore. “Better.”

The Queen smiled once more and then she stood up from her armchair and sat on the bed next to the young Wraith. She took a glass of water from the night table and she pressed the edge of the glass on Sin’s lower lip. “Drink,” she ordered gently and patiently waited till Sin started to drink. “My brother took care of you since he brought you to me, but even he needs a rest. So I took his place. Do not be alarmed, I will not hurt you. You are dear to my brother’s heart and here on a Keepers Flag ship is no place for torture and pain. You are safe now.”

“The... the Keepers... flag ship?” Sin said more than surprised. “But I do… do not belong here, I…”

“Your Mother, the Queen, sold you to me. You were so sick everyone thought you would die soon so she gave you to me. And I took my Commander back.”

There was pure shock in Sin’s eyes. His mother had sold him. She... had sold him to the Keepers after so many years he had served on her ship, raised his brother, taken care of the lab and the ship when she was so full of herself she didn’t have the time to care? She just… put him aside when he was ill? She got rid of him? Her own son? The child of hers and Wraith she declared to love? 

“My brother!” he screamed when he realized what that meant. “My little brother! Is he here?” he asked the Queen, absolutely terrified about the answers. She shook her head, sadly. “No... no, no, no, no… NO! I cannot abandon him, he needs me. Please!”

The Queen touched his shoulder and pushed him back into the bed. “This is not a place for a child. He will stay on your Mother’s ship. When he is old enough he can join us if that will be his wish. But I doubt it.”

“You don’t understand!” Sin felt a strange wetness on his face. It was only a few seconds later he realized that he started to cry. “He has no other than me. I raised him! Please… please, don’t! He is going to be so lonely! He will think I abandoned him! He is my little brother, please!”

She looked at him with a strange compassion in her expression. “There is nothing I can do. She gave only you to me, weak and dying in my brothers arms. There was no mention of your brother. I did everything I could to save you. But you are still weak and you need a lot of sleep to recover completely. Then you can try to get your brother, but I will allow it no sooner.”

Sin bitten his lip in a deep embarrassment and lowered his head. “I am sorry my Queen. You are so kind to me, forgive me.”

“There is no need for that,” she said immediately. “We are all family there. I will expect some respect, but I understand your confused feelings right now. There is no need for that apology.”

He nodded. “What… what was wrong with me? I remember so much pain and dizziness…”

She sighed and gently wiped tears from his face with her small and elegant hand decorated with many rings and other jewelry. “What is still wrong with you,” she corrected him. “I was able only suppress it but even I cannot stop it from troubling you for the rest of your life. You are very powerful, Sin. Tell me... how do you think the Keepers Flag ship can be so big when there are limits for it when it cames to ordinary ships of other alliances?”

“I.. I do not know?”

“The Keepers ship take the strength to function from its Queen. Without a Queen the ship will start to break until there is nothing left. The secret about our ship is that we cooperate with it. My mental power keeps the ship this grand and functioning and I am very, very strong Queen, my sweet Sin. But you are much more stronger than me. With your power, you could be able to make this ship even more marvelous and great and make others ships submit to your will. Your strength is terrifying. And it is killing you.”

Sin blinked. “Killing me? But how?”

“You do not use it. It accumulates inside you and when it reach a crucial point, it starts to kill you. It creates so much pressure inside your body. It starts with your brain – the fever, the pain – and after that it begins to consume your inner organs. For you to live you have to use that power, Sin. You cannot run from it. You cannot hide from it.”

“I… I do not want this. Please…”

“Neither did I wanted to have my own powers,” she said after a while. “But I was born for power. Power is what makes me strong and independent… it is what makes others to fear me and love me in the same time. I can wake up the hidden strength in the hearts of my people – and believe me, that is not easy task. In the end I grew fondness for my power… and I started to love it, to enjoy it. I can force my power to submit to my will and create a better life for those I love. This power, Sin, is not a curse. It is a way out, an escape route, for those you wish to help and to save. It is a gift.”

She was so beautiful... like a rare gem, residing inside a heart of hers people. Sin could understand now, why she was a goddess in his lover’s eyes. This marvelous Queen with a tender, but strong heart and sharp mind… who was ruling over a ship of damned, cursed Wraith, forced to serve others and keep the long forgotten history still fresh and undying.

“My Queen,” Sin whispered, almost terrified of her voice, of her words, piercing his crying, desperate being. “I… I am scared.”

She smiled and touched Sin’s short hair. Gently, like a mother, tending to her sick child. “If you were not, I’d take you for the fool, Sin. To master this power, you have to fear it. You have to love it. You must shelter yourself from it and, in the same time, welcome it in the darkest and deepest places in your own soul. Do you wish to die, Sin?” she asked then.

“N-no.”

“No,” she repeated lovingly and bent over to kiss Sin’s forehead. “Then you will live. You should sleep now. My brother will be there, when you wake up.”

+++

In the evening, Sin was finally able to stand on his own feet. Every step he took drained his energy reserves, but he needed this. He needed to walk again, even if to take just a few simple steps to look around his and Stardust rooms. 

Everything he felt was pain, but he still felt better than before. Stardust’s hand was put firmly around his hips to help him stand and to secure his every step preventing him from fall. In fact, most of his body was pressed against Stardust hard, masculine body, taking comfort in his presence and so much appreciated help. Finally, he took three steps just by himself, just a few seconds before he collapsed into Stardust’s arms again. 

But his lover didn’t mind. 

He smiled a little and with every step Sin made, his smile grew wider and happier. 

“Put your hands there,” Stardust quietly ordered and helped Sin to put his palms onto the windowsill. They stood there for many minutes, watching the stars and comets, with their fingers entangled. Stardust lovingly touched Sin’s skin with the tip of his nose and his mouth, kissing him gently on the curve of his neck, enjoying the simple moment of peace and harmony. 

“I was so scarred I was going to lose you,” he whispered then. “You were so pale and in so much pain. I did not know what to do, I am so sorry.”

Sin wanted so much to smile for his lover… to tell him everything was fine, that they were fine and all was going to be fine. He understood him… he knew he would be dead if not for Stardust and his sharp mind, but still - this was not a life he dreamed of, he wished for. To be a guardian of the past, recorder of the future. A Wraith without honor. He was born to fight. Now... he was forced to maintain peace in those calm, silent halls.

Without his brother.

They were teared from each other. Forever. There was no way Sin would allow his sweet brother to become a Keeper. No way. Never.

So he stayed silent, knowing that his silence pained his lover, and unable to talk even for Stardust’s sake.

“I love you.”

This time, Sin smiled a little. “I know,” he forced himself to answer. “I just… I… I…”

“Shh… there is no need for you to say those words,” Stardust whispered into Sin’s ear. “We can just watch the stars. Focus on them, Sin, and let me hold you until you are too tired to stand.”

“Will you carry me to our bed then? When I’ll get too tired, you know.”

Stardust chuckled, happy for Sin’s usual cheeky nature return. ”Yes, I will carry you,” he laughed. “Sin, I… I am truly sorry. I know you wanted to be the great warrior and scientist and do great things and now you will never be able to fulfill those dreams, but-“

“Stardust,” Sin interrupted him. “It does not matter now. You saved me by bringing me here but… I need some time, please. I do not think that I am capable of talking about this today and not scream and shout at you. I need to… ya know, get used to this.”

“I understand,” Stardust said and he kissed Sin’s neck again, up and down, touching his sensitive ear with passion and devotion in the process. “But I want you to feel better. Please, tell me if you are in need for anything. If I can provide it, I will.”

Sin turned carefully in Stardust arms so he was facing him and kissed him on his lips, instantly. “I know. And If I will need anything to get better, I will ask you, I promise. Now, I just need you to hold me. Can you do it, please?” he whispered and lowered his head to Stardust chest, resting there, as his lover tightened the grip of his arms around his body. It felt so good to be so close to his heartbeat. 

Stardust always smelled so good. His smell was specifics… masculine but sweet, like fruit mixed with flowers in the hot, shiny spring. It was intoxicating. They were together just for a couple of long years, but Sin already could not imagine his future without Stardust smell in it. It became a part of his life.

“Stardust?”

“Hm?”

“I am tired.”

+++

Sin was lying safely tucked under the soft blanket in Stardust strong arms when he woke up. He felt refreshed, but his body was still weak and it protested every time he tried to move out of the bed. So, after a few minutes of trying, he gave up and set his mind on some more rest. But sleep never came to him easily so after a few minutes of wasted effort, he gave up and just watched his lover’s sleeping face. 

It occurred to him, that Stardust was such an ugly creature with all his scars from burns and fights, which destroyed his face, neck and half of the skull, so his hair did not grow on his left side, only on the right. Yes, he was ugly and scarred, but, in the same time, he was his... and he was gentle and loving and even carefree when he was in a situation he could relax in. He could depend on him, if needed to be. He saved him.

So, Sin decided, the look did not matter. For him, Stardust was beautiful. Was that love? The admiration, devotion, feeling of heartaching loneliness, when he was not around. He did not know. Maybe. How could one be sure, that he was in love, when he could not force himself to completely trust another being?

It was silly.

So Sin smiled and closed his eyes. His body was so warm, pressed against the strong body of his lover. He was content. Even if his head ached and his heart was unsure and confused, he was ultimately happy in Stardust embrace. He felt safe, loved. 

There was nothing else he needed from this world. 

Just this.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave kudos, if you find the story to your liking!  
> Any kudos and comments will be highly appreciated!


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